AravaArthritisFibromyalgiaLiving with chronic illnessLiving with chronic painLyricaMethotrexateRheumatologistSide effects
Tired Of It All
It's been three weeks today since I took my first dose of arava and I'm officially in struggle town. Side effects are in full swing and I'm tired of it all. I started getting headaches two weeks ago, and they are still hammering away in my head. Waves of nausea don't want to leave either and I've had enough. I just want out, but there is no way out. I feel like I'm a prisoner of pain. I feel like I'm being punished for a crime I didn't commit. I'm tired of the side effects. I'm tired of the headaches, the nausea, the loss of appetite. I'm tired of the eczema and acne. I'm tired of the weight loss, extreme fatigue and profound pain. I'm too tired to do this anymore, I just want it all to stop. It's been four years of constant pain that never goes away. It never lets up, and after four years I'm left wondering when/if it's going to get any better. It's taking me hours to get to sleep due to pain and in the morning I don't have the strength to wake up at a decent time. I'm sleeping up to fifteen hours a night to maintain the fight against fatigue caused by the drug arava. When I wake up I don't feel well at all. I'm greeted with a sore throat and feel disheveled by dizziness. It's horrible. I'm beginning to think the combination of arava and methotrexate is too much for my body to cope with. Upon researching arava, I read that it can take up to four to six weeks to notice a decrease in pain and up to three to four months to see optimum results. I can't wait that long, I don't have patience when it comes to needing pain relief, I need it NOW! Besides, it might not even work and my evaluation of arava so far? Epic fail.
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I am so looking forward to some headache and nausea free days, I could really use the break. The drug wars have officially begun all over again.
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